Sunday, March 18, 2007

Top Five Movies Of:

'04
Sideways
The Aviator
Life Aquatic
Motorcycle Diaries
Kill Bill 2

'05
Brokeback Mountian
Squid and the Whale
Ballad of Jack and Rose
Constant Gardner
Walk the Line

'06
The Queen
The Painted Veil
Half Nelson
Lil' Miss Sunshine
An Inconvenient Truth

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think I'll just stick to Gene's picks.

Andy D said...

Wow....that is a pretty terrible list.

BostonDissentator said...

Them's film reviewing words...so where's your list, Andy?

I have only seen five of the fifteen that Brooklyn mentions, which I think makes sense because I think that part of the criteria is that if no one has seen them they are considered good...as far as I'm concerned Blood Diamond was by far the best film of 2006...out of the ones that I personally saw I would go:

Blood Diamond (by far the best movie of 06)
Pan's Labrynth
The Departed
Russian Dolls
V for Vendetta

BrooklynDissentator said...

All right, all right. This is getting a little ridiculous. Miller bashes my list, then Boston, and now Andy D? Yesterday a guy on the street lobbed a copy of the village voice at my head. I feel like I'm taking you-are-all-retarded pills.

First of all, how is no one going to read anything I write on this blog but a silly list of movies I threw up one day when I was hungover and waiting for my girlfriend to get out of the shower so we could go to brunch?

Second of all, my list was completely inoffensive. I made very sensible picks for the top five. Maybe if you saw my top twenty, you'd find something to argue about. But all the movies I chose in the top five are undeniably amazing. What didn't you like, Andy? Inconvenient Truth? Motorcycle Diaries? Find me someone in the universe that didn't like the Motorcycle Diares. I'll congratulate them for being a tremendous douche bag.

Thirdly, the movies of '06 sucked. Maybe you found some notable ommisions for '04 and '05. I gave serious consideration to Eternal Sunshine, Huckabees, and the Sea Inside on '04, and Sin City, Capote, Broken Flowers, Junebug, and Nobody Knows in '05, and another day some of those fine films may have snuck in there. But don't wine about Million Dollar Baby, Ray, Kinsey, or Finding Neverland in '04, and Crash and Cindarella Man in '05, because those were cinematic atrocities.

As for '06, it was just a lousy year for movies. There really aren't a lot of other options. I wavered on Lil Miss, but I put it in there for lack of better options. I hated Departed, Children of Men, V for Vandetta, Little Children, Devil Wears Prada (I didn't see it, i just assume it sucked).

And if anyone missed the brilliance of the Queen, then I really think we have nothing more to say to eachother and I'll bid you good day.

Now if anyone else lobbs something at my head, would they please make it a table-side lamp or a new liver- you know, something I could use, instead of all this jaberwocky.

BostonDissentator said...

First off, what are you doing out of the shower when your girlfriend is in the shower?

Second of all, no one reads anything you read except your movie list????? Whatever man, I commented on your Barack Obama post, and I wrote fucking actual posts both in reference to your Pidgeon post and to you "I'd like to have another word with you" posts, so don't tell me that all I'm commenting on is your silly movie list where you tell us about how much you like Brokeback Mountain as your girlfriend is in the next room naked. As for your other movies, dude, I haven't seen The Constant Gardener, but from the title I'm pretty sure it's as interesting as watching the grass grow (BA-ZING!!!). Furthermore, I am shocked that a movie snob such as yourself would ever put Walk the Line on a top five list. Johnny Cash is a great musician but the movie fucking sucked just as much as all of the other sensuously entropic eulogies claiming to be the most elemental and circumscribed of biopics. Honestly the only line that I saw being walked was the line around the block to make another boring movie about the life of a famous musician whose life is good at first and then, big surprise a jack pops out and life gets hard and money can't buy happiness and drugs can't either and your family and relationship problems catch up with you and you clap and the kids clap and the dog claps and I die a little inside.

And one last thing, I think you forgot about Vickers, because I would probably put both of the recent Allen-Johanssen collaborations (Match Point, and Scoop) up there as well.

Whose ever heard of a snozberry,
BD

BrooklynDissentator said...

The BD is a stern but fair man. I didn't forget about Vickers, BD. I never forget about Vickers. Because, BD, I am Vickers. And you are too. We're all Vickers. Anytime Hollywood makes a lousy movie and forgets their one charge-the man who cares about what he watches- they make Vickers of us all. Anytime there's an affront to taste and decency, its Vickers that gets hurt, man. Anytime someone makes a sequel that drags down the quality of the originol, they forgot about Vickers. Anytime a comedian of limited range ventures from his simple and god-given talent, they forgot about Vickers. It's tough out there- I know- just trying to maintain a little dignity as a viewer, when all they want to do is take it away from you. When all you want to do is let them. Just throw it in. The fight is too tough and too sad and the spoils never justify the bitter sacrifice. I know, becasue I'm out there everyday, loosing an unwinnable war. No, I didn't forget about Vickers, BD. I only wish I could.

Unknown said...

brooklyndissentator is an unimaginative mofo

i guarantee when he came out of all of those movies, everyone liked them, so just to be contrary he said they sucked, but he said it in such a way with his fancy words that it sounded like he gave reasons for his dislike of the movie, but he basically said nothing but "the movie sucked" in multi-syllabic words.

BrooklynDissentator said...

Jason, you were with me when I walked out of one of those movies. And I trust you'll remember my exact words were: "pita?"

Pita!

PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITA!!!!!!!!!!!!